Grief and Loss


Grief is how one copes with loss. Grief can present itself in so many different ways. Just to name a few, you may experience a change in your sleep pattern (sleeping more or less), change in your appetite, tightness in your chest or throat, inability to concentrate, confusion, sadness, anger, guilt, anxiety or a feeling of hopelessness. When people think of grief, most often they think of it related to a death. However, we can grieve for a multitude of reasons.

As with grief, loss is not just a simple definition. There are so many different types of loss. Again, most people think of loss being related to death. However, loss can be the loss of a job, a home, a pet, a divorce, loss of health, or loss of social status. The list is almost endless.

Your loved one is diagnosed with a life threatening illness and you spend months–maybe years–supporting them and caring for them. You learn that they will not live much longer. You may start the grieving process before the actual death by preparing family members, getting papers in order, thinking about what life will be like without them. When the death occurs, you have a change in your sleep pattern, no longer feel hungry, cannot focus on your job and you find yourself crying throughout the most of the day. You are grieving the loss due to a death.

You have worked for the same company for most of your career and suddenly find yourself unemployed with no preparation. How are you going to pay your bills? How are you going to find a job at your age? How are you going to find a job with your skill set? How do you tell your loved ones you lost your job? Those are just some of the questions you may be struggling with. While trying to answer just one of those questions, you are angry, moody, preoccupied, and unable to sleep. You are grieving over the loss of your job and social status that comes with being employed.

After years of marriage, you find yourself going through a divorce. Suddenly, you are responsible for taking care of the children, you are learning how to manage household finances, and you now have to share custody of children. Now you are having trouble getting out of bed, feel tired all of the time, are overwhelmed by all the responsibilities you have, you have a loss of appetite and feel isolated because you no longer have your “couple friends” for you social life. You are grieving over the loss of your marriage and the dream of what life was going to be like.

Each person’s loss cannot be compared to another person’s loss. How we grieve is a very personal journey.

I do realize that even through my best efforts, I cannot erase your emotional pain and grief, however, what I can do is meet you where you are at, offer support,time and guidance during this most difficult time in hopes that I will be able to help you find your own way through the grieving process.